Faith

Faith is such a seemingly easy concept. When I first started walking with the Lord my Freshman year of college it seemed so obvious that I have faith in God. DUH. That's the whole point of being Christian. Doubts soon sunk in, though, and I became very concerned that I somehow was not able to have enough faith to be truly saved. I felt like God was distant and that through going to bible studies, living for spiritual emotional experiences, and saying all the "right" things I could somehow bridge the gap I felt between me and God. Did I ever mention that I'm totally an external processor? This may be a long ride.

The Lord has been revealing to me that, as the lead singer of Tenth Avenue North says, "it's not about how much faith we have, but who we put our faith in." It's encouraging to be reminded that my sins were all paid for the moment I accepted Christ as my savior. There's literally NOTHING I can do to deserve God's love. All I can do with the knowledge of the Gospel is live to glorify Him and have faith in all that He has promised us. I won't even pretend to have even close to everything figured out or that I'm going to suddenly be able to live the life God originally intended, but this week I have been assured that faith alone can break down barriers previously left unhindered.

Coming on summer project in the first place was a huge step of faith. I had to give up being a camp counselor for another summer at a place I consider my second home. Along with that, I had to give up making money in the summer. In fact, I had to raise money just to come to Ecuador. Upon arriving in Ecuador, I was faced with a giant language barrier. I am met with person after person who I desire so deeply to talk with, but cannot without a translator. Then, initiating conversations on campus is difficult. It takes courage only the Lord can provide to approach people and ask them if they would be willing to share what they believe and hear what I believe.

A few posts ago, I talked about not being able to see the outcomes of working by faith and being satisfied no matter the results. While many things are left unknown to me, I have already seen beautiful results of God's work through our team. Just today, Helen, Megan, and I waited for a follow-up appointment that didn't show. We decided to walk the opposite way across campus than normal and approached a group of girls. They were absolutely not interested in hearing us out. So we kept walking. We were nearing the edge of campus and decided to talk to the last group of girls we saw.

They were so intent on hearing what we had to say. It was a missionary's dream conversation. They were so thirsty for understanding and a relationship with Christ. After they prayed to receive Christ, we spent the rest of our time talking with them. One of the girls told us that they had been talking about their struggles when we approached. She felt as if we brought light to them and their situations. Hallelujah!

Let me just stop there. The follow-up appointment could have showed up and we could have spent all day with her. We could have gone the way we normally go. That group of girls could have let us share the Gospel. We could have turned around because there weren't a lot of people that way.


So many other things could have happened.

I will never be convinced that it was a coincidence that we conversed with those two women. I will have faith until God confirms it personally that He planned that appointment divinely. The rewards--two new sisters in Christ--far outreaches the fear and worry I feel when I fail to have faith.

I'm feeling humbled and amazed by God. As I learn about faith and the power of the Holy Spirit more and more, I desire closeness with Him. I want Him to be the one who decides my path. I want to never go another moment without remembering His grace.

Amen!

Ashley